the truest of updates, a.k.a. for adrienne

i am lured by faraway distances, the immense void i project upon the world. a feeling of emptiness grows in me; it infiltrates my body like a light and impalpable fluid. in its progress, like a dilation into infinity, i perceive the mysterious presence of the most contradictory feelings ever to inhabit a human soul. I am simultaneously happy and unhappy, exalted and depressed, overcome by both pleasure and despair in the most contradictory harmonies. i am so cheerful and yet so sad that my tears reflect at once both heaven and earth. if only for the joy of my sadness, i wish there were no death on this earth.
-E.M.Cioran 1911 - 1995

xo.